Landon and I adopted a puppy! He's a cute little 7-week old boxer puppy, and we love him. He is smart and adorable. His name is Hawkeye. He doesn't know that yet.
I know there is a lot I need to catch up on... but that's for some other day. I'm sitting here in front of the fireplace, Landon is sleeping on the couch behind me, and our little pup is napping right next to me. They're both softly snoring. I wish I could capture this moment and keep it forever.
Sunday, December 12, 2010
Saturday, November 20, 2010
"She's doing this all herself?"
BIG UPDATE: We got the house! I'm in it now working on remodeling the first room, the master bedroom, pics soon to follow! It's been such a whirlwind week I haven't had time to post before now...!
Tuesday, November 2, 2010
Small Victories
Today, I bought groceries.
I have heretofore been rather unmotivated to accomplish this simple task, so today, I'm counting that as a win. And that's the big answer. How I cope. All the times I've been asked "How do you do it?" ("it" being, live without my spouse for months at a time), and that's it. Groceries.
I'm just over halfway through Landon's first long venture out to sea (with many more to follow), and I think I'm reaching a point where I'm ok. I've been trying to stay busy, take things a day at a time, and take pride accomplishments no matter how small. Between the house, a friend with two kids up the street, music, and doctor appointments I've kept the calendar pretty full, but beyond that I'm starting to recognize the small victories. And that's the key, really. Working out- small victory. Driving somewhere- small victory. Making a phone call. Eating yogurt. Getting out my front door. And today, groceries. All small victories.
I've had to fight the urge to "save things" for when he's home. I'm accepting, slowly, that I can watch our favorite show without him, I can go out to eat without him, that I have to be able to not only function but let myself enjoy life without him here. And that has to be ok. Misery doesn't prove I miss him more. These are lessons I'm learning, and ones I would never choose to learn on my own accord. I don't know what the months ahead have in store for us, but I finally felt just the other night for the first time that I have the ability to thrive in less than ideal circumstances. And I'm doing it. I still have good days and bad days, but ultimately, I know I'm stronger now than I was two months ago. Two years ago. And so on. And I think as long as I'm moving forward, even if it's alone at times, that I'll be just fine.
I have heretofore been rather unmotivated to accomplish this simple task, so today, I'm counting that as a win. And that's the big answer. How I cope. All the times I've been asked "How do you do it?" ("it" being, live without my spouse for months at a time), and that's it. Groceries.
I'm just over halfway through Landon's first long venture out to sea (with many more to follow), and I think I'm reaching a point where I'm ok. I've been trying to stay busy, take things a day at a time, and take pride accomplishments no matter how small. Between the house, a friend with two kids up the street, music, and doctor appointments I've kept the calendar pretty full, but beyond that I'm starting to recognize the small victories. And that's the key, really. Working out- small victory. Driving somewhere- small victory. Making a phone call. Eating yogurt. Getting out my front door. And today, groceries. All small victories.
I've had to fight the urge to "save things" for when he's home. I'm accepting, slowly, that I can watch our favorite show without him, I can go out to eat without him, that I have to be able to not only function but let myself enjoy life without him here. And that has to be ok. Misery doesn't prove I miss him more. These are lessons I'm learning, and ones I would never choose to learn on my own accord. I don't know what the months ahead have in store for us, but I finally felt just the other night for the first time that I have the ability to thrive in less than ideal circumstances. And I'm doing it. I still have good days and bad days, but ultimately, I know I'm stronger now than I was two months ago. Two years ago. And so on. And I think as long as I'm moving forward, even if it's alone at times, that I'll be just fine.
Friday, September 24, 2010
Eye on the Prize
Or, "What Doesn't Kill Me..."
So big news first- Landon and I are buying a house! Well, hopefully. Assuming the whole process over the next month and a half doesn't present any insurmountable problems or leave me so far removed from my sanity that I land in an institution.
The tricky part (in addition to the general trickiness I'm discovering is inherent in any house-buying) is that I am responsible for doing this all on my own. Landon left the day before we found out our offer was accepted and won't be back until three weeks after we move in. I'm going through a learning curve, for sure. So far I'm pretty proud of myself for scheduling an inspection and getting paperwork to our lender, although I feel like I'm just barely keeping ahead of some rabid beast chasing after me.
Paperwork is my least favorite part of anything, and I'm so anxious to get my hands on this house and start painting and ripping up carpet I can hardly stand it. I am certainly staying busy, and here I was wondering what I would fill my time with when Landon was away. Silly me. I should have counted on Life showing up.
Even with all the headache of the buying process I'm really, really excited. I will be sure to tell Landon, though, that he doesn't have to buy me a house every time he leaves just to keep me occupied.
So big news first- Landon and I are buying a house! Well, hopefully. Assuming the whole process over the next month and a half doesn't present any insurmountable problems or leave me so far removed from my sanity that I land in an institution.
The tricky part (in addition to the general trickiness I'm discovering is inherent in any house-buying) is that I am responsible for doing this all on my own. Landon left the day before we found out our offer was accepted and won't be back until three weeks after we move in. I'm going through a learning curve, for sure. So far I'm pretty proud of myself for scheduling an inspection and getting paperwork to our lender, although I feel like I'm just barely keeping ahead of some rabid beast chasing after me.
Paperwork is my least favorite part of anything, and I'm so anxious to get my hands on this house and start painting and ripping up carpet I can hardly stand it. I am certainly staying busy, and here I was wondering what I would fill my time with when Landon was away. Silly me. I should have counted on Life showing up.
Even with all the headache of the buying process I'm really, really excited. I will be sure to tell Landon, though, that he doesn't have to buy me a house every time he leaves just to keep me occupied.
Saturday, September 18, 2010
I'm Maui-ed!
So about a month and a half ago, my wonderful amazing fabulous awesome husband surprised me with a trip to Hawaii. We got on a plane a few weeks later, and spent a week in Maui for our slightly belated honeymoon. And it. Was. AMAZING.
I was adventurous and rugged. We filled every day with as much as we could, here are some highlights:
Snorkel Trip- we took a boat tour out to two different snorkeling locations. The ride itself was fantastic, and we even had dolphins swim alongside our boat for a little while. In spite of swallowing a liter of sea water my first time out, I got the hang of snorkeling and saw coral and a spectacular array of fish I had previously seen only in aquariums. We even got to swim with turtles, and thanks to our nifty under-water camera, got some great shots.
Zip Line Tour- I had never done a zip line tour before, but my sister did back in the spring and was raving about it for weeks. So when the opportunity arose for us to do one while in Maui, we took it. We had a blast! It was a pretty incredible feeling to be soaring over treetops and valleys, hundreds of feet in the air. The last line (there were seven total) was 3,600 feet long, and one of the guides said Landon easily went at least 60 mph. And our guides were way cool, both for the zipline and the snorkel tour.
Swinging Bridges Hike- One of the days we took a few hours to go hiking, and at every step we were surrounded by unbelievably beautiful scenery. Waterfalls off in the distance, bamboo and jungle foliage in abundance, creeks and rivers running alongside the trails... There were also two swinging bridges along the trail, which made for precarious fun. As hard as it was to pull myself away from the ocean, the hike was amazing and I'm glad we went.
Ocean You Can Swim In Without Getting Hypothermia- I'm not normally much of a water girl, but I loved being in the ocean. The temperature was perfect, I loved feeling the movement of it (a little different than Grandpa's pool), and we spent a lot of time swimming and snorkeling. Landon's uncle lives in Maui, and took us around one morning to 4-5 different beaches so we got to see a lot of different facets to the coastline there.
The Food- Hawaiian breakfast = awesome. I probably had french toast with bananas and macadamias and coconut syrup three different times and it was always ridiculously delicious. I had the best pulled-pork BBQ sandwich of my life. Shave ice is wonderful. Burgers from Cheeseburger in Paradise are also wonderful. I even ate sushi, and loved it so much we went right back the next night. Amazing food.
Landon and I were swimming in the ocean the last night we were there while the sun was setting. It was a spectacular sunset, but very bittersweet to be there in the midst of all that beauty and have to go the next morning. I've never been anywhere that's had such a profound impact on me that I was crying when I had to leave. I have to go back, and the sooner the better.
I had an amazing time, and we took lots of pictures. I'll just have to look at those to hold me over until next time!
I was adventurous and rugged. We filled every day with as much as we could, here are some highlights:
Snorkel Trip- we took a boat tour out to two different snorkeling locations. The ride itself was fantastic, and we even had dolphins swim alongside our boat for a little while. In spite of swallowing a liter of sea water my first time out, I got the hang of snorkeling and saw coral and a spectacular array of fish I had previously seen only in aquariums. We even got to swim with turtles, and thanks to our nifty under-water camera, got some great shots.
Zip Line Tour- I had never done a zip line tour before, but my sister did back in the spring and was raving about it for weeks. So when the opportunity arose for us to do one while in Maui, we took it. We had a blast! It was a pretty incredible feeling to be soaring over treetops and valleys, hundreds of feet in the air. The last line (there were seven total) was 3,600 feet long, and one of the guides said Landon easily went at least 60 mph. And our guides were way cool, both for the zipline and the snorkel tour.
Swinging Bridges Hike- One of the days we took a few hours to go hiking, and at every step we were surrounded by unbelievably beautiful scenery. Waterfalls off in the distance, bamboo and jungle foliage in abundance, creeks and rivers running alongside the trails... There were also two swinging bridges along the trail, which made for precarious fun. As hard as it was to pull myself away from the ocean, the hike was amazing and I'm glad we went.
Ocean You Can Swim In Without Getting Hypothermia- I'm not normally much of a water girl, but I loved being in the ocean. The temperature was perfect, I loved feeling the movement of it (a little different than Grandpa's pool), and we spent a lot of time swimming and snorkeling. Landon's uncle lives in Maui, and took us around one morning to 4-5 different beaches so we got to see a lot of different facets to the coastline there.
The Food- Hawaiian breakfast = awesome. I probably had french toast with bananas and macadamias and coconut syrup three different times and it was always ridiculously delicious. I had the best pulled-pork BBQ sandwich of my life. Shave ice is wonderful. Burgers from Cheeseburger in Paradise are also wonderful. I even ate sushi, and loved it so much we went right back the next night. Amazing food.
Landon and I were swimming in the ocean the last night we were there while the sun was setting. It was a spectacular sunset, but very bittersweet to be there in the midst of all that beauty and have to go the next morning. I've never been anywhere that's had such a profound impact on me that I was crying when I had to leave. I have to go back, and the sooner the better.
I had an amazing time, and we took lots of pictures. I'll just have to look at those to hold me over until next time!
Thursday, July 29, 2010
Psychological warfare
Lately I've been having some major inadequacy dreams. I'm pretty sure I know why, but that's irrelevant as pertaining to this blog post. They aren't just scary dreams either. They're not really scary at all, in a traditional sense. These are custom made for Courtney bad dreams, designed specifically to make me feel completely and utterly worthless. So my brain, pulling from the deep dark recesses to find the one thing that will disturb and make me question my self-worth more than anything else, has decided the cruelest thing to do to me... is put me in math class.
I'm not even kidding. This has gone on several nights in a row. Math class. Every time. I haven't even had a math class in almost seven years. Evidently, it was a more scarring experience than I gave it credit for. Sure, I like to think of myself as at least a passably intelligent human being, so I don't really enjoy being so inept at something so simple. But I wouldn't have thought with my conscious brain that math class- above all else in my entire lifetime- would be the most poignant reminder of personal ineptitude.
So when I throw a comment out there like "I'm not real good with numbers", I mean it. I have the nightmares to prove it.
Does this happen to anyone else?
I'm not even kidding. This has gone on several nights in a row. Math class. Every time. I haven't even had a math class in almost seven years. Evidently, it was a more scarring experience than I gave it credit for. Sure, I like to think of myself as at least a passably intelligent human being, so I don't really enjoy being so inept at something so simple. But I wouldn't have thought with my conscious brain that math class- above all else in my entire lifetime- would be the most poignant reminder of personal ineptitude.
So when I throw a comment out there like "I'm not real good with numbers", I mean it. I have the nightmares to prove it.
Does this happen to anyone else?
Thursday, July 22, 2010
Irony at the Airport
I'm in LA for a second time in about a month, mostly to work on music stuff but secretly to hang out with the Malicks (because they're awesome). It's my first experience co-writing, and it's been wonderful. We've cranked out 4 1/2 songs in 3 1/2 days, so we're calling it a definite win. And they're really good songs too. Added bonus.
The irony came at airport security. I was waiting for my bag to reappear on the the other side of the luggage car wash when I noticed several security people looking very intently at the screen. I made eye contact with one of them as he came over to attach bag with owner and take a closer look. He apologized for the inconvenience, then pulled my scriptures out of my backpack and said "Oh, this is it." Apparently, because of the thin pages it looks like one solid brick on the x-ray machine (and shows up in a "bad color", I was told), and due to its size, it appeared to be a solid brick of C4 or something like it on their monitors. Honestly the security guard was amused that the suspicious object turned out to be a religious text. I was too.
The irony came at airport security. I was waiting for my bag to reappear on the the other side of the luggage car wash when I noticed several security people looking very intently at the screen. I made eye contact with one of them as he came over to attach bag with owner and take a closer look. He apologized for the inconvenience, then pulled my scriptures out of my backpack and said "Oh, this is it." Apparently, because of the thin pages it looks like one solid brick on the x-ray machine (and shows up in a "bad color", I was told), and due to its size, it appeared to be a solid brick of C4 or something like it on their monitors. Honestly the security guard was amused that the suspicious object turned out to be a religious text. I was too.
Tuesday, July 6, 2010
Human Stampede
On June 26th, I ran my first half-marathon.
Anyone who witnessed my pathetic attempts at jogging all through junior high and high school will attest to how great a miracle this truly is. It was amazing. Even though I didn't feel completely ready for it, I did it. And this, like some things in life, you do just to finish.
It came at the end of a crazy few weeks. Landon flew off the Virginia, and I spent two weeks toodling around the greater Salem area. I picked him up from the airport on a Thursday, we hung out a couple days, and then I flew off to LA for a music thing (which is a post for another day, but totally totally cool). I was there for another few days, then came back to Salem, then drove up to Seattle the next day for race check-in and the expo. I had never been to a race expo before, and let me tell you, it was an experience. I sampled so much energy goo I'm surprised I got any sleep that night. But I'm a sucker for free samples.
The next morning, we drove the two miles down to the start line (along with 27,000 other people). Needless to say, it was fairly slow going. We ditched the car (we being me and my parents, who participated along with my brother and sister-in-law), and left it in Landon's hands to get back to the hotel and then come find all of us at the finish line later. He was a good sport about the whole thing, and made it all logistically possible (thanks honey).
I stuck with my mom because we were in the same starting corral (we were indeed feeling like cattle, so the name was fitting), but by the time we got there everyone was moving so we jumped in a few corrals back. Which is probably where I belonged anyway. We followed some runners cutting in where the fence was open, and they were ready to close it up right behind me so I turned back and yelled "MOM!" and they let her through too. It would have been a long walk in the wrong direction otherwise. I guess it was a decent walk to the actual start line but it kept moving pretty well and there were so many people and so much adrenaline that I didn't really notice. We saw the big banner ahead at last, and before I knew it we were on our way.
*IMPORTANT SIDE STORY* So.... we get up to Seattle the night before the race, right? We check in to our hotel, start making dinner plans, etc, and suddenly at 7:30pm as I'm laying out my race outfit for the next morning, a very dark realization sunk in. "Oh no, oh no, oh no, you've got to be kidding me!!" Sure enough, I had left my shoes in Oregon. My SHOES, people. Like, the ones I had been running in for months and was planning on running in for 13.1 miles the next morning? Those shoes. My RUNNING shoes. Landon, who I was convinced was realizing he had married the biggest idiot on the planet, shook his head, chuckled a little and said "Well, I guess we better find you some shoes then." So we did. At 8:00pm we pulled up to a big mall by the Olive Garden where we were eating which was thankfully still open, went straight to Lady Footlocker and found my shoes. I took the display, presented it to the lovely employee there and told her I needed a 6 1/2, and held my breath as she went to the back room. She came back with a box, I blurted out my whole tragic story, and then we made our purchase. And found out Footlocker gives a military discount. On our way out of the mall, Landon says to me "Anything for a new pair of shoes, huh?"
The course was very pretty, and with the exception of the final mile, no severe hills. I ran with my mom for the first three, then she left me in the dust when I had to walk. I quickly learned I was not coordinated enough to run and drink at the water stations at the same time. It was a surreal experience to run alongside thousands of people, a human stampede. I felt really solid through ten miles, which surprised me and I'm very happy with. The last couple of miles were very hard. But we got to run along the water for while, through a tunnel, up on the freeway express lanes then finally through town, and it was an adventure. I finished just under three hours, and I'm happy with that. I plan to do more in the future. In my shiny new running shoes.
I had a small burst of energy left and crossed the finish line with it. Someone gave me a medal, which I put on and it was heavy. I wandered for a couple of minutes but found my dad pretty quickly- a huge relief. It was good to have him right there, I needed to be told to stay hydrated, get one of those foil blankets to stay warm, and eat something, none of which I wanted to do, initially. We gradually found our other family members, took pictures, and headed to the train to get back to the car. I was so sore I could barely walk. I loved saying I ran 13.1 miles for the rest of the day though, and my new shoes are pretty awesome. All in all a great experience, and I look forward to my next one.
My feet were fine, by the way.
Anyone who witnessed my pathetic attempts at jogging all through junior high and high school will attest to how great a miracle this truly is. It was amazing. Even though I didn't feel completely ready for it, I did it. And this, like some things in life, you do just to finish.
It came at the end of a crazy few weeks. Landon flew off the Virginia, and I spent two weeks toodling around the greater Salem area. I picked him up from the airport on a Thursday, we hung out a couple days, and then I flew off to LA for a music thing (which is a post for another day, but totally totally cool). I was there for another few days, then came back to Salem, then drove up to Seattle the next day for race check-in and the expo. I had never been to a race expo before, and let me tell you, it was an experience. I sampled so much energy goo I'm surprised I got any sleep that night. But I'm a sucker for free samples.
The next morning, we drove the two miles down to the start line (along with 27,000 other people). Needless to say, it was fairly slow going. We ditched the car (we being me and my parents, who participated along with my brother and sister-in-law), and left it in Landon's hands to get back to the hotel and then come find all of us at the finish line later. He was a good sport about the whole thing, and made it all logistically possible (thanks honey).
I stuck with my mom because we were in the same starting corral (we were indeed feeling like cattle, so the name was fitting), but by the time we got there everyone was moving so we jumped in a few corrals back. Which is probably where I belonged anyway. We followed some runners cutting in where the fence was open, and they were ready to close it up right behind me so I turned back and yelled "MOM!" and they let her through too. It would have been a long walk in the wrong direction otherwise. I guess it was a decent walk to the actual start line but it kept moving pretty well and there were so many people and so much adrenaline that I didn't really notice. We saw the big banner ahead at last, and before I knew it we were on our way.
*IMPORTANT SIDE STORY* So.... we get up to Seattle the night before the race, right? We check in to our hotel, start making dinner plans, etc, and suddenly at 7:30pm as I'm laying out my race outfit for the next morning, a very dark realization sunk in. "Oh no, oh no, oh no, you've got to be kidding me!!" Sure enough, I had left my shoes in Oregon. My SHOES, people. Like, the ones I had been running in for months and was planning on running in for 13.1 miles the next morning? Those shoes. My RUNNING shoes. Landon, who I was convinced was realizing he had married the biggest idiot on the planet, shook his head, chuckled a little and said "Well, I guess we better find you some shoes then." So we did. At 8:00pm we pulled up to a big mall by the Olive Garden where we were eating which was thankfully still open, went straight to Lady Footlocker and found my shoes. I took the display, presented it to the lovely employee there and told her I needed a 6 1/2, and held my breath as she went to the back room. She came back with a box, I blurted out my whole tragic story, and then we made our purchase. And found out Footlocker gives a military discount. On our way out of the mall, Landon says to me "Anything for a new pair of shoes, huh?"
The course was very pretty, and with the exception of the final mile, no severe hills. I ran with my mom for the first three, then she left me in the dust when I had to walk. I quickly learned I was not coordinated enough to run and drink at the water stations at the same time. It was a surreal experience to run alongside thousands of people, a human stampede. I felt really solid through ten miles, which surprised me and I'm very happy with. The last couple of miles were very hard. But we got to run along the water for while, through a tunnel, up on the freeway express lanes then finally through town, and it was an adventure. I finished just under three hours, and I'm happy with that. I plan to do more in the future. In my shiny new running shoes.
I had a small burst of energy left and crossed the finish line with it. Someone gave me a medal, which I put on and it was heavy. I wandered for a couple of minutes but found my dad pretty quickly- a huge relief. It was good to have him right there, I needed to be told to stay hydrated, get one of those foil blankets to stay warm, and eat something, none of which I wanted to do, initially. We gradually found our other family members, took pictures, and headed to the train to get back to the car. I was so sore I could barely walk. I loved saying I ran 13.1 miles for the rest of the day though, and my new shoes are pretty awesome. All in all a great experience, and I look forward to my next one.
My feet were fine, by the way.
Sunday, July 4, 2010
America, the beautiful
I'll catch you up on all the craziness of my life soon, but for today, I wanted to share all the verses of "America the Beautiful".
O beautiful for spacious skies,
For amber waves of grain,
For purple mountain majesties
Above the fruited plain!
America! America!
God shed his grace on thee
And crown thy good with brotherhood
From sea to shining sea!
O beautiful for pilgrim feet
Whose stern impassioned stress
A thoroughfare of freedom beat
Across the wilderness!
America! America!
God mend thine every flaw,
Confirm thy soul in self-control,
Thy liberty in law!
O beautiful for heroes proved
In liberating strife.
Who more than self their country loved
And mercy more than life!
America! America!
May God thy gold refine
Till all success be nobleness
And every gain divine!
O beautiful for patriot dream
That sees beyond the years
Thine alabaster cities gleam
Undimmed by human tears!
America! America!
God shed his grace on thee
And crown thy good with brotherhood
From sea to shining sea!
O beautiful for halcyon skies,
For amber waves of grain,
For purple mountain majesties
Above the enameled plain!
America! America!
God shed his grace on thee
Till souls wax fair as earth and air
And music-hearted sea!
O beautiful for pilgrims feet,
Whose stem impassioned stress
A thoroughfare for freedom beat
Across the wilderness!
America! America!
God shed his grace on thee
Till paths be wrought through
wilds of thought
By pilgrim foot and knee!
O beautiful for glory-tale
Of liberating strife
When once and twice,
for man's avail
Men lavished precious life!
America! America!
God shed his grace on thee
Till selfish gain no longer stain
The banner of the free!
O beautiful for patriot dream
That sees beyond the years
Thine alabaster cities gleam
Undimmed by human tears!
America! America!
God shed his grace on thee
Till nobler men keep once again
Thy whiter jubilee!
O beautiful for spacious skies,
For amber waves of grain,
For purple mountain majesties
Above the fruited plain!
America! America!
God shed his grace on thee
And crown thy good with brotherhood
From sea to shining sea!
O beautiful for pilgrim feet
Whose stern impassioned stress
A thoroughfare of freedom beat
Across the wilderness!
America! America!
God mend thine every flaw,
Confirm thy soul in self-control,
Thy liberty in law!
O beautiful for heroes proved
In liberating strife.
Who more than self their country loved
And mercy more than life!
America! America!
May God thy gold refine
Till all success be nobleness
And every gain divine!
O beautiful for patriot dream
That sees beyond the years
Thine alabaster cities gleam
Undimmed by human tears!
America! America!
God shed his grace on thee
And crown thy good with brotherhood
From sea to shining sea!
O beautiful for halcyon skies,
For amber waves of grain,
For purple mountain majesties
Above the enameled plain!
America! America!
God shed his grace on thee
Till souls wax fair as earth and air
And music-hearted sea!
O beautiful for pilgrims feet,
Whose stem impassioned stress
A thoroughfare for freedom beat
Across the wilderness!
America! America!
God shed his grace on thee
Till paths be wrought through
wilds of thought
By pilgrim foot and knee!
O beautiful for glory-tale
Of liberating strife
When once and twice,
for man's avail
Men lavished precious life!
America! America!
God shed his grace on thee
Till selfish gain no longer stain
The banner of the free!
O beautiful for patriot dream
That sees beyond the years
Thine alabaster cities gleam
Undimmed by human tears!
America! America!
God shed his grace on thee
Till nobler men keep once again
Thy whiter jubilee!
Friday, May 14, 2010
Dear Baked Goods,
I should have done this a long time ago. I tried to convince myself that our undeniable chemistry would make everything ok- love conquers all, right? Well. I have finally decided to leave you.
You're just no good for me. You build me up and I feel amazing when you're around but as soon as you're gone I feel sick. You've been toying with me for a long time, but no more. Things have to change.
I am now seeing Fruit. We've been going out almost a week now, and even though the spark that we shared isn't there, I know Fruit will treat me better. Maybe I'll even learn to love Fruit one day. Sure right now I'm still missing you, but I have to give Fruit a chance, for my own well-being. I hope you understand.
I was fooling us both thinking we could go on like we were. I hope we can still be friends, maybe meet for lunch and catch up every once in a while. Really. Let's still be friends.
Yours truly,
Courtney
PS- when we meet for lunch, bring your buddy Chocolate.
I should have done this a long time ago. I tried to convince myself that our undeniable chemistry would make everything ok- love conquers all, right? Well. I have finally decided to leave you.
You're just no good for me. You build me up and I feel amazing when you're around but as soon as you're gone I feel sick. You've been toying with me for a long time, but no more. Things have to change.
I am now seeing Fruit. We've been going out almost a week now, and even though the spark that we shared isn't there, I know Fruit will treat me better. Maybe I'll even learn to love Fruit one day. Sure right now I'm still missing you, but I have to give Fruit a chance, for my own well-being. I hope you understand.
I was fooling us both thinking we could go on like we were. I hope we can still be friends, maybe meet for lunch and catch up every once in a while. Really. Let's still be friends.
Yours truly,
Courtney
PS- when we meet for lunch, bring your buddy Chocolate.
Friday, April 16, 2010
Out with the old
We're headed to Astoria. In just a few days, now. And unless we are hit by some unforeseen circumstance (which very well can happen), we should be there for a few years. Which sounds very permanent considering how much we've been bouncing around this last year.
To explain to blog title, I am realizing I need a new system. Up 'til now, it's been "oh, we're moving. time for a new toothbrush." or "oh, we're moving. we should change the water filter." In the interest of my health and hygiene, I need a new system.
We've been doing our best to house and apartment -hunt via the internet and have found a couple of seemingly suitable options. One cute little house that we/I have grown particularly attached to, even though I should know better. It'll be nice to walk through some places, and I hope settling into a nice place will be as painless as possible. I'm getting excited now that it's practically upon us. Good timing.
In other totally exciting news, Landon graduated from A School today and advanced to the rank of petty officer! I am very proud of him and was happy to be part of the ceremony. Also, he looked very handsome all dressed up in his blues.
In other other totally exciting news, our one year anniversary is Sunday. I can't believe it. That was the fastest year ever. To celebrate, we're moving.
To explain to blog title, I am realizing I need a new system. Up 'til now, it's been "oh, we're moving. time for a new toothbrush." or "oh, we're moving. we should change the water filter." In the interest of my health and hygiene, I need a new system.
We've been doing our best to house and apartment -hunt via the internet and have found a couple of seemingly suitable options. One cute little house that we/I have grown particularly attached to, even though I should know better. It'll be nice to walk through some places, and I hope settling into a nice place will be as painless as possible. I'm getting excited now that it's practically upon us. Good timing.
In other totally exciting news, Landon graduated from A School today and advanced to the rank of petty officer! I am very proud of him and was happy to be part of the ceremony. Also, he looked very handsome all dressed up in his blues.
In other other totally exciting news, our one year anniversary is Sunday. I can't believe it. That was the fastest year ever. To celebrate, we're moving.
Wednesday, March 31, 2010
I'm Running a Half Marathon
or, A Brief History of Jones Family Running
It started with the Monmouth/Independence annual 4th of July parade. Awesome, in all its podunkitude. Every 4th of July, for my entire life, I and thousands of others have flocked to this gem of small town America to celebrate my brother's birthday. Just kidding, that's just what we tell him. Really we're celebrating cheesy floats, kamakazi street crossings, horses, and free candy. It's quite spectacular. Some of the flocking thousands include a majority of my mom's side of the family. The 4th of July and Christmas are our big holidays, and I love that we get to see most of the family twice a year- it's understood that anyone that can make there, does.
Now before this annual parade, there is also an annual "mini marathon", about 2.5 miles along the parade route. A ridiculous number of people participate, ranging from very serious runners to very not serious runners. Our family knew that my aunt was a serious runner for a while (not that she ever runs this particular race seriously- just the marathons and halfs and stuff), and she would run the mini and gradually convince others in the family it was a good idea to go as well. Then, in just the last couple of years, more and more family members got involved. And then it was a "thing". Suddenly there's no fewer than a dozen of us lining up to run this silly 4th of July race, and even I got involved for last year's run. So did both of my parents. And all of my siblings (minus one, who would have if he hadn't been ill). Most of them started "training" a little before so as not to look silly. I started training three days before and did indeed end up looking silly. We all ran, cousins, aunts, siblings, and parents, and I came in dead last. By a LOT. But it stuck.
In the months since, my dad is running an unbelievable number of miles per week and my oldest brother is training for a marathon. The whole family has gotten very into it, and honestly it's been a wonderful thing to happen us. I have personally tried to be runner since January but confess I have been inconsistent. Then, just a few days ago during my weekly call to my mother, I was invited to run a half marathon in June. My parents were both running in it, my brother running the coinciding marathon, and several others from church were going too. A half marathon? Half. Marathon. The only consistent running I had ever done was in high school gym class and I despised it, and the only marathons I had been involved in were tv related. My longest run to date was 5.5 (would have been less but I got lost). But I said "Sure! I'll do it! Sign me up!" before I could overthink my way out of it. The truth is, I've needed something like this to work toward, a real reason to push myself. If I'm not ready for it, I can't go calling the other 24,999 participants and ask them to hold off another month. I have to be ready.
I've completed two training days- the training schedule I'm using is ambitious but necessary- and I'm feeling alright. I'm nervous. About running. Which seems a little silly on principle for me. But I remember my brother once saying something like "Nervous is a sign you know what's going on". So better nervous than oblivious. It'll be a journey, for sure. Right now, I'm just looking to finish, and running decently would be great. I'd rather not be last, but mostly I want to finish.
And how awesome is this training to smash that darn 4th of July race that's been haunting me.
More to come.
It started with the Monmouth/Independence annual 4th of July parade. Awesome, in all its podunkitude. Every 4th of July, for my entire life, I and thousands of others have flocked to this gem of small town America to celebrate my brother's birthday. Just kidding, that's just what we tell him. Really we're celebrating cheesy floats, kamakazi street crossings, horses, and free candy. It's quite spectacular. Some of the flocking thousands include a majority of my mom's side of the family. The 4th of July and Christmas are our big holidays, and I love that we get to see most of the family twice a year- it's understood that anyone that can make there, does.
Now before this annual parade, there is also an annual "mini marathon", about 2.5 miles along the parade route. A ridiculous number of people participate, ranging from very serious runners to very not serious runners. Our family knew that my aunt was a serious runner for a while (not that she ever runs this particular race seriously- just the marathons and halfs and stuff), and she would run the mini and gradually convince others in the family it was a good idea to go as well. Then, in just the last couple of years, more and more family members got involved. And then it was a "thing". Suddenly there's no fewer than a dozen of us lining up to run this silly 4th of July race, and even I got involved for last year's run. So did both of my parents. And all of my siblings (minus one, who would have if he hadn't been ill). Most of them started "training" a little before so as not to look silly. I started training three days before and did indeed end up looking silly. We all ran, cousins, aunts, siblings, and parents, and I came in dead last. By a LOT. But it stuck.
In the months since, my dad is running an unbelievable number of miles per week and my oldest brother is training for a marathon. The whole family has gotten very into it, and honestly it's been a wonderful thing to happen us. I have personally tried to be runner since January but confess I have been inconsistent. Then, just a few days ago during my weekly call to my mother, I was invited to run a half marathon in June. My parents were both running in it, my brother running the coinciding marathon, and several others from church were going too. A half marathon? Half. Marathon. The only consistent running I had ever done was in high school gym class and I despised it, and the only marathons I had been involved in were tv related. My longest run to date was 5.5 (would have been less but I got lost). But I said "Sure! I'll do it! Sign me up!" before I could overthink my way out of it. The truth is, I've needed something like this to work toward, a real reason to push myself. If I'm not ready for it, I can't go calling the other 24,999 participants and ask them to hold off another month. I have to be ready.
I've completed two training days- the training schedule I'm using is ambitious but necessary- and I'm feeling alright. I'm nervous. About running. Which seems a little silly on principle for me. But I remember my brother once saying something like "Nervous is a sign you know what's going on". So better nervous than oblivious. It'll be a journey, for sure. Right now, I'm just looking to finish, and running decently would be great. I'd rather not be last, but mostly I want to finish.
And how awesome is this training to smash that darn 4th of July race that's been haunting me.
More to come.
Monday, March 22, 2010
Spring Break visitors
It's taken six months of living in northern California, but now I feel like I have experienced San Francisco. Landon's parents and brother came into town, we got to show them around the base, and we all went to explore San Francisco. Now I can say that I have been across the Golden Gate Bridge, walked Fisherman's wharf and Ghirardelli Square, been down Lombard street, and driven through very, very hilly nice neighborhoods. We saw some pretty parks, passed numerous trolleys, and took pictures. It was a lot of fun, and I'm so glad we finally took the opportunity to see the city before we move next month.
As an added bonus, I successfully cooked a full Sunday dinner for five- YES! So I'm pretty proud of myself.
I also made cookies. Twice.
As an added bonus, I successfully cooked a full Sunday dinner for five- YES! So I'm pretty proud of myself.
I also made cookies. Twice.
Tuesday, January 26, 2010
Running in the Rain
I renewed my commitment to run last week. It's easier these days, with my family being the crazy bunch of runners they are now, plus my Nike+ (which I love). Add in my sickening amount of free time and living in a fairly flat area, I have ideal conditions that I know won't last forever. With that in mind, I kind of see this as my chance to break into it, try and make it a habit while I have these advantages.
I've had short periods of time in the last 8 months where I've tried to run consistently, and last Saturday was a new Day 1. Armed with my new Nike+ wristband and an iPod, I bravely headed out the door to start being a runner. I was a block away from my apartment when the blue sky very suddenly disappeared and it started hailing. HAILING. I was being pelted in the face by ICE. It came down hard and fast and completely unexpectedly. But something weird happened. I smiled. My mother's voice came into my head saying "At a certain point, it's not like you're going to get any wetter." And so I embraced it. After a minute, the hail wore off and turned into a slushy heavy rain. And I was still smiling. As a matter of fact, the harder it rained, the happier I felt. I found the whole thing oddly exhilarating.
Different thoughts ran through my head. "How committed I must look!" "Well, I'm definitely not going to get over-heated." "I bet I'm really confusing people. Cool." Something in me loved that everyone else was scurrying to get out of the rain, angry they had chosen this particular window of time to venture out. No one else wanted the rain. But I did. The rain is familiar, like an old friend. And it was there to keep me company, pushing me to finish.
It finally let up when I came within a quarter mile of finishing, and then the novelty wore off. I realized I was freezing, my clothes were cold and heavy, and my feet were very squelchy in my shoes (I wrung out an impressive amount of water from my socks shortly after arriving home). I guess being thoroughly soaking wet is only fun when you're caught out in the rain. Once I was back home I had to start the process of wringing out and hanging up all my layers, drying out my shoes, making sure my iPod and Nike+ stuff were ok after so much water exposure, and getting myself back above hypothermic levels. So that was less fun. But I hope I can recapture that feeling I had running in the rain.
I hope I can keep myself running. I've never been good at it. I don't have much speed, I definitely don't have much stamina, but hopefully this is the time it sticks. I want to be in better shape. And I definitely want to sleep better. Perhaps above all I don't want to come in last on the 4th of July.
**It should be noted that rain is ok only if it starts AFTER you start running...
**Also, I wouldn't choose to run in such conditions every day
I've had short periods of time in the last 8 months where I've tried to run consistently, and last Saturday was a new Day 1. Armed with my new Nike+ wristband and an iPod, I bravely headed out the door to start being a runner. I was a block away from my apartment when the blue sky very suddenly disappeared and it started hailing. HAILING. I was being pelted in the face by ICE. It came down hard and fast and completely unexpectedly. But something weird happened. I smiled. My mother's voice came into my head saying "At a certain point, it's not like you're going to get any wetter." And so I embraced it. After a minute, the hail wore off and turned into a slushy heavy rain. And I was still smiling. As a matter of fact, the harder it rained, the happier I felt. I found the whole thing oddly exhilarating.
Different thoughts ran through my head. "How committed I must look!" "Well, I'm definitely not going to get over-heated." "I bet I'm really confusing people. Cool." Something in me loved that everyone else was scurrying to get out of the rain, angry they had chosen this particular window of time to venture out. No one else wanted the rain. But I did. The rain is familiar, like an old friend. And it was there to keep me company, pushing me to finish.
It finally let up when I came within a quarter mile of finishing, and then the novelty wore off. I realized I was freezing, my clothes were cold and heavy, and my feet were very squelchy in my shoes (I wrung out an impressive amount of water from my socks shortly after arriving home). I guess being thoroughly soaking wet is only fun when you're caught out in the rain. Once I was back home I had to start the process of wringing out and hanging up all my layers, drying out my shoes, making sure my iPod and Nike+ stuff were ok after so much water exposure, and getting myself back above hypothermic levels. So that was less fun. But I hope I can recapture that feeling I had running in the rain.
I hope I can keep myself running. I've never been good at it. I don't have much speed, I definitely don't have much stamina, but hopefully this is the time it sticks. I want to be in better shape. And I definitely want to sleep better. Perhaps above all I don't want to come in last on the 4th of July.
**It should be noted that rain is ok only if it starts AFTER you start running...
**Also, I wouldn't choose to run in such conditions every day
Wednesday, January 20, 2010
Casting Beauty and the Beast
My brother Logan recently blogged about his "dream cast" for the animated favorite, Swan Princess. And he did a really, really awesome job. So I thought it would be a lot of fun if we both came up with a Beauty and the Beast cast and then compare notes. I clicked on his blog and saw that he had posted his, but I didn't read it yet so I can write mine more objectively. So here goes...
Belle- Kate Beckinsale. Perhaps a little obvious, but Kate Beckinsale rocks, and I think she could play all the dynamics of Belle very genuinely. Belle has to have a dreamer side, a stern side, a compassionate side, a tough chick side, a brush-off-Gaston side, a look really good in a ball gown side, etc, etc, and KB can do it all. Keira Knightly would have done a wonderful job too, but my cast tended to lean a bit older.
Maurice- WIlliam H. Macy. I briefly considered Robin Williams, but thought it would be difficult arguing his sanity. William H. Macy is the perfect father figure in my story, and could give just the right amount of eccentricity without being too out there.
Gaston- Hugh Jackman. He can totally carry off the over the top attitude of Gaston, plus he's ripped, and if it were a musical version he could sing too. HJ was the first person I mentally cast, and I would love to be able to see him as Gaston.
Lafou- Giovanni Ribisi. Despite the in-charge role he had in Avatar, I think GR would play an ideal sidekick. A little snivelly, ready to continually boost Hugh Jackman's ego, and devious enough to go along with any dastardly plan his bff comes up with. As an added bonus, he's a full 7 inches shorter than HJ.
Lumiere- Hugh Laurie. I struggled with this one. First, I wanted Paul Bettany, and then I wanted Robert Downey Jr, both of which would have played a delightful and convincing Lumiere. But Hugh Laurie won out because of his superior chemistry with my Cogsworth, who is...
Cogsworth- Stephen Fry. British. Proper. And goes back with Hugh Laurie for so many decades, their relationship would be totally believable and their on screen banter would be priceless.
Mrs Potts- Emma Thompson. I can't believe how long I struggled with Mrs Potts simply due to the little flirtyness that happens with Maurice at the very end of the movie. I needed someone motherly, orderly, and that would fit well with William H. Macy as the other parental figure. Emma Thompson was my answer.
Beast- Wentworth Miller. Yes, that guy from Prison Break. Tell me he can't do bitter and angsty, while looking great with KB at the end of the movie.
Added bonus! Tim Curry as the creepy guy from the asylum. For obvious reasons.
So there you have it. I spent a lot of time worrying about the chemistry and all the different relationships between the characters, and now I realize now that Logan makes it look easy. But I feel pretty good about my choices. Now I get to go read his blog.
Belle- Kate Beckinsale. Perhaps a little obvious, but Kate Beckinsale rocks, and I think she could play all the dynamics of Belle very genuinely. Belle has to have a dreamer side, a stern side, a compassionate side, a tough chick side, a brush-off-Gaston side, a look really good in a ball gown side, etc, etc, and KB can do it all. Keira Knightly would have done a wonderful job too, but my cast tended to lean a bit older.
Maurice- WIlliam H. Macy. I briefly considered Robin Williams, but thought it would be difficult arguing his sanity. William H. Macy is the perfect father figure in my story, and could give just the right amount of eccentricity without being too out there.
Gaston- Hugh Jackman. He can totally carry off the over the top attitude of Gaston, plus he's ripped, and if it were a musical version he could sing too. HJ was the first person I mentally cast, and I would love to be able to see him as Gaston.
Lafou- Giovanni Ribisi. Despite the in-charge role he had in Avatar, I think GR would play an ideal sidekick. A little snivelly, ready to continually boost Hugh Jackman's ego, and devious enough to go along with any dastardly plan his bff comes up with. As an added bonus, he's a full 7 inches shorter than HJ.
Lumiere- Hugh Laurie. I struggled with this one. First, I wanted Paul Bettany, and then I wanted Robert Downey Jr, both of which would have played a delightful and convincing Lumiere. But Hugh Laurie won out because of his superior chemistry with my Cogsworth, who is...
Cogsworth- Stephen Fry. British. Proper. And goes back with Hugh Laurie for so many decades, their relationship would be totally believable and their on screen banter would be priceless.
Mrs Potts- Emma Thompson. I can't believe how long I struggled with Mrs Potts simply due to the little flirtyness that happens with Maurice at the very end of the movie. I needed someone motherly, orderly, and that would fit well with William H. Macy as the other parental figure. Emma Thompson was my answer.
Beast- Wentworth Miller. Yes, that guy from Prison Break. Tell me he can't do bitter and angsty, while looking great with KB at the end of the movie.
Added bonus! Tim Curry as the creepy guy from the asylum. For obvious reasons.
So there you have it. I spent a lot of time worrying about the chemistry and all the different relationships between the characters, and now I realize now that Logan makes it look easy. But I feel pretty good about my choices. Now I get to go read his blog.
Saturday, January 16, 2010
My issue with Walmart
Yes I shop there. Not often, but we're budget-conscious newly-weds and it's five minutes away, so sometimes necessity calls. I've found that having a list gives me a greater chance of holding on to more of my sanity, but most of the time I'm in a rush to leave within a few minutes of entering. Also, for the last time Guy In The Parking Lot, we do not want any tamales.
But my real issue with them comes from a commercial. I think their "family moments cost less at Walmart" campaign is a solid one, but one commercial in particular irked me.
They show a family playing Monopoly. Full of potential (although showing MY family playing Monopoly would likely do more harm than good for the wholesome family togetherness vibe). The "mom" narrator says something about the daughter being "competitive", but "then she did something nice", followed by "I pretended not to notice".
The "nice" thing the sister did? Give the little brother a hotel. Which he proceeded to put on Mediterranean, next to his one house on Baltic.
There are SO MANY problems here.
First off, if the sister character here was truly competitive, she would do no such thing. I am unclear as to whether or not it would be considered a legal move to purchase or hotel for someone else, but why would you want to? Then, the little brother puts it on Mediterranean with one house on Baltic already. You can't put one house on one and a hotel on the other- there can only be a one house difference on your monopoly, duh. Plus, if you could get away with breaking that rule, why would you put the hotel on Mediterranean? To make it a whopping $250? At least Baltic would be $450. And then probably my favorite part- the mom "pretends not to notice"?? How could you possibly pretend not to notice? And where is the dad in all this? Sigh....
It's a known policy in the Jones house that you play hard and honestly, no matter the age or status of your fellow competitors. Oh it's your first time playing? Too bad. Only three years old? Tough luck. That's how you learn. And when you do win, you know you've earned it. That's how WE do family moments.
But my real issue with them comes from a commercial. I think their "family moments cost less at Walmart" campaign is a solid one, but one commercial in particular irked me.
They show a family playing Monopoly. Full of potential (although showing MY family playing Monopoly would likely do more harm than good for the wholesome family togetherness vibe). The "mom" narrator says something about the daughter being "competitive", but "then she did something nice", followed by "I pretended not to notice".
The "nice" thing the sister did? Give the little brother a hotel. Which he proceeded to put on Mediterranean, next to his one house on Baltic.
There are SO MANY problems here.
First off, if the sister character here was truly competitive, she would do no such thing. I am unclear as to whether or not it would be considered a legal move to purchase or hotel for someone else, but why would you want to? Then, the little brother puts it on Mediterranean with one house on Baltic already. You can't put one house on one and a hotel on the other- there can only be a one house difference on your monopoly, duh. Plus, if you could get away with breaking that rule, why would you put the hotel on Mediterranean? To make it a whopping $250? At least Baltic would be $450. And then probably my favorite part- the mom "pretends not to notice"?? How could you possibly pretend not to notice? And where is the dad in all this? Sigh....
It's a known policy in the Jones house that you play hard and honestly, no matter the age or status of your fellow competitors. Oh it's your first time playing? Too bad. Only three years old? Tough luck. That's how you learn. And when you do win, you know you've earned it. That's how WE do family moments.
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